Battle of the Private Caribbean Hideaways | Travel + Leisure
  • E-mail to a Friend
  • Print Print
  • RSS RSS
  • AddThis

Battle of the Private Caribbean Hideaways

Return to main article

These days, it seems, every cruise line has its own island, or at least its own strip of beach. Disney is the proud owner of a freestanding landmass called Castaway Cay, and Royal Caribbean has appropriated an area of beach called Labadee. When the ships arrive at these places, here's what you can expect:

Labadee Officially part of the Republic of Haiti, Labadee was identified as such when we sailed. But we've noticed that since the latest political upheavals in that country, the cruise line likes to bill Labadee as part of Hispaniola, the island Haiti shares with the Dominican Republic. The experience, however, remains the same. Though the "aqua park" we bought tickets for was kind of a rip-off (some hard-to-climb iceberg-shaped floats in a roped-off area), the snorkeling was decent, and there was free barbecue, as well as numerous musicians and hair-braiders, one of whom employed a much-used comb on Charlie at $5 per braid.

People buy tropical drinks and hang out on this island. The water looked clear and beautiful, but it was hard not to notice this sign by the shore: "SWIM AT YOUR OWN RISK. Be aware of ocean conditions, water depths, and wave intensities that constantly change and may include marine life such as jellyfish, barracuda, sharks, sea urchins, sea lice, and fire coral."

Sea lice? Sea lice? And we thought we just had to worry about head lice in that braider's comb. Fortunately, we didn't meet any predators or parasites, and now when we tell people we've been to Haiti—oh, excuse us, Hispaniola—we'll be telling the truth.

Castaway Cay Disney being Disney, this whole place has been "imagineered" within an inch of its life. As a result, the only port of call that looked the way you'd expect a tropical island to look was the only one that was fake.

As usual with Disney, the food was good and the activities were diverse and well planned. Charlie eagerly took part in an excavation in which he "dug up" a few old bones and skulls from the sand. But, also as usual with Disney, the artificiality outlived its welcome. On the tram that took us to various stops around the island, a voice in a "Hey, mon" lingo reminded us to use sunblock, eliciting snorts and snickers. At that point someone joked that Disney probably has a giant net around the island to keep the sharks away. Clearly, the non-natives were getting restless.

And then there was the employee housing we managed to glimpse through the trees on one of our tram rides: forlorn-looking barracks, located out of sight of all but the most observant tourists. We bet nobody was folding washcloths into swans to place on those people's beds at night.

GUESSAGAIN'S ISLAND Our question for the cast members on the island and aboard the ship: "Is Castaway Cay really a tropical island—you know, is it actually in the tropics?"

Cast Member 1 "We're way south of the Tropic of Cancer! We're right by the Equator!"

Cast Member 2 "Tropical, yes. The Caribbean tropics."

Cast Member 3 "Yeah, it's in the Bahamas."

Cast Member 4 "It's in the Bahamas." Pause. "Um, I don't know." At which point he picked up a house phone and called the bridge. "Actually," he said, after he hung up, "we're just off the coast of Florida, so we're well above the tropics."

Copyright © 2008, American Express Publishing. All rights reserved.